Intolerable Cruelty

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If Katherine Zeta-Jones isn’t one of the most beautiful women in Hollywood, tie me up and call me Jed. And if George Clooney isn’t one of the most viral, to be envied men in Hollywood tie me up and call me Betty. So, with all of this incredible star power how is it that this movie just makes me want to be tied-up, bound and gagged and dropped off at the nearest video outlet to await it’s release?

I’m not saying that Intolerable Cruelty is intolerable, it has it’s moments. There are times in this kitchen-sink flick when Marylin Rexroth (Zeta-Jones) and Miles Massey (Clooney) clinch great, red-hot moments, but overall the story doesn’t hit the mark, and at current movie prices these two should be hitting the bulls-eye.

I was genuinely excited about this film prior to viewing it. It isn’t often these days that a Romantic Comedy stars people old enough to shave, let alone deliver comic, sexually charged dialogue. The added punch, of the often brilliant direction of Joel Coen (Fargo, Raising Arizona, O’Brother) and a major budget should have birthed an enduring piece to be viewed with a lover while cozied-up on the couch. Delivered was a 100 minute problem film that struggles because the stakes are never high enough, and the two main characters never fall far enough to come back, redeemed and fighting insanely for love ... they just kind of paw at it. What I expected was the hostility of War of The Roses with An Affair to Remember ending, and what was presented was a watered-down What Women Want with a Bob Barker ending.

A story about two people who have reached that point in their lives where they desire someone to love, Intolerable moves fairly well through it’s allotted time. Strange Coen brother’s characters portrayed by the likes of Billy Bob Thornton, Geoffrey Rush and Cedric the Entertainer provide the movie with it’s primary forward momentum, but these odd little sidebars seem contrived and become a bit tiresome. The most successful divorce attorney in Los Angeles, Massey, falls in love with Rexroth, the queen of the gold-diggers and this is almost as far as the plot goes. Most of this has been in trailers for months, so it’s easy to get into the story. From start to finish, not one surprise comes to the surface until the end ... that’s right you’re the one that’s surprised when you’re looking around, the lights are on and you’re saying to yourself, “Is that all there is, is that all there is?” like some empty Peggy Lee echo.

See this movie only as a video or ... if you really have to see Kathy and George kiss on the big-screen (the only really good moments), then go to an early movie, sit in the cheap seats with a portable DVD player and in between the kissing stuff watch ... what else, An Affair to Remember.